For a while now, this has been on my heart.
During these last few years, I have seen things that really stuck with me—Christians not always being reasonable. And before I go any further, I want to say this clearly:
This is not a blog to put anyone down.
This is not about making anyone feel bad.
I’m writing this simply to reason with Christians.
When we read verses like:
“Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand.” — Philippians 4:5
I can’t help but ask:
What does it actually look like to be a reasonable Christian?
What Is “Reasonable”?
Let’s start with the definition.
Reasonable:
“(of a person) having sound judgment; fair and sensible.” — Oxford Languages
Sound judgment.
Fair.
Sensible.
If I’m being honest, there have been plenty of times in my life where I’ve been none of those things.
Times when I wasn’t sound in my judgment.
Times when I wasn’t fair.
Times when I definitely wasn’t sensible—especially when someone disagreed with me.
I didn’t just want to share my perspective…
I wanted them to see things my way and change their mind.
But that’s actually the opposite of what Philippians 4:5 is calling us to.
What Should Mark a Christian?
People should think of Christians as reasonable.
But how?
Because we are:
“Quick to listen, slow to speak…” — James 1:19
I was talking to my kids about this today. I told them something that really challenged me too:
👉 You can disagree with someone, truly listen to them, never even share your own opinion, and still “win.”
Why?
Because sometimes people just need to be heard.
When we listen, we build relationship.
We build trust.
And maybe later—in the right time—they’ll be open to hearing what we believe.
What I’m Seeing (And Why It Matters)
I see Christians sometimes:
- Name-calling
- Putting people down
- Arguing just to win
But what is the fruit of that?
It doesn’t bring people closer to God.
It doesn’t even bring people closer to your perspective.
It usually does the opposite.
God already has the victory.
Sometimes we might “lose” a moment or an argument…
But what if that opens the door for something deeper later?
(And we know—it’s all in God’s timing anyway.)
Why I’m Writing This
We are living in a time where:
- People are searching for something more
- Our nation feels deeply divided
And as Christians, we have an opportunity to be different.
To bridge gaps instead of widening them.
To listen instead of reacting.
To love instead of proving a point.
A Simple Challenge
Let’s be people who are:
- Quick to listen
- Slow to speak
- Known for our reasonableness
We, of all people, should understand that we are not always right…
But we know Who is.
So the next time you’re talking with someone who disagrees with you:
Pause.
Listen well.
Let them talk.
Ask questions—not to prove a point, but to truly understand their heart.
Listen to the Holy Spirit before you speak.
And when you feel that urge rising up—the need to prove them wrong…
Take a breath.
And choose quiet.
Let’s be the kind of Christians people feel safe talking to.
Not because we agree with everything… but because we listen well, love deeply, and trust God with the outcome.
I created a 30-day Scripture Writing plan to help you slow down, spend time with God, and grow in your faith.
You can sign up below and I’ll send it straight to your inbox 💛
Leave a Reply